Friday, July 20, 2007


It's 1.35am. I've been working a near straight...XX hrs ( soooraay, brain's not functioning LOL) okay...I've been working since 2.15pm (today) & if I count working through the previous night too..that'd make it, since 10pm the night before. (cries out silently, "help me").

**end of physical update**

Here's what happened in between when I took a break today:

"hi, welcome to Starbucks! what would you like?"

( smiles while thinking " to be run over by a truck & sent to heaven cuz I didn't kill myself..I only wished for it")

"hi :) Could I have...a grande iced caramel macchiatto & what's your strongest coffee?" ( knowing fairly well that would be an expresso but hoping that there's of a higher dose, something to "knock me out")

"sure. That's $9.90 miss." ( hands bill) "wait over there for your drinks"


Now I'm sitting here in my cold room with a cold double shot expresso & a finished iced caramel macchiato, recalling what someone told me...
Jess, your "terrible". Think of all the poor people your making work at the coffee plantations. I said, " you do know that's how they make their $$ right? I mean c'mon, I work long hours sometimes through the night. coffee "helps". Plus, look at this way. Plantation workers--->farm the beans--->makes their $$--->who buys em? People like me. Designers do.----> they get their cash. It's a cycle. We need them. They need us." Then this person said. " maybe you should go live in brazil. Learn about their coffee n stuff. "

My mind instantly began imagining "life in Brazil".... OKAY let's start out with a brilliant opening here: I own a coffee plantation, making tonnes of cash ( we're writing the script "HOLLYWOOD style" ;) FYI). I wake up in the morning sitting in a bikini by the pool that overlooks my coffee plantation, sipping on a aromatic cup of I've got "guards" all over the place to watch my land. I hear shots fired down at the plantation. Sudden commotion. I jump up & wrap myself in a white robe ( which apparently came with loaded guns in the pockets) ROFL. 8-) Suddenly i turn around & I've got a cigar in my mouth, hair in wet tendrils, large aviator shades sitting low on my nose bridge, 2 guns in hand, white robe untied & blowing in the wind. (LOL can u believe this..I can't) Then listen! stop the laughing, look----------> ( my big lines follow) " Catch dem. Bring dem to meeee. I waont dem alive." ( & yup pronounced exactly that way) Next thing I know, I'm running in my haivaianas (of course "check BRAZIL" rofl) & I'm ending this scene with a classic: "I'll Be BACK".

*end of scene* thank u thank u. 8-) :P

(Again, no offense. It's just my imagination. Nothing intended to offend anyone with that short script)

So that chain of "thought" has ended & I'm just pondering about my day up until now. Why does it seem like I'm god's "toy", like he's having fun watching my sometimes pathetic life? ( OH...i get it..maybe he created the pc game "the sims"? I'm his new character.) I'm jk! (don't send me to hell purrrleaseeee....) It's just that it feels like...whenever my life's going rather good..everything's as I want it, everyone's doing fine yada yada..he swoops down on me to make sure I'm in check by throwing me a week of crap to deal with? (HALLO! I appreciate what I've got, you don't have to do this to me know? I didn't just blow $300 on a Hermes scarf to wipe my butt..know what I mean?) Basically, I've just had barely 2 hours of sleep, not eaten much & survived on 3 cups of tea/coffee..( i think that's bad...i know it could be worse but still). I feel like i've just been run over by a car. There's 1 thing that summarizes that up tho.."LIFE". ( not that I've lived long enough to say I've been through everything..but I know that's just how it goes..)

What should I do then if "life's" gonna be that way every once & again? Of course being away on a good holiday would do wonders..BUT who has that luxury all the time? So I turn to the little things that make me happy, that make my day..the lil perks.

1. A GOOOOD cup of earl grey tea ( chilled) with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.
2. A good read. ( I HEART NYLON)
3. Spending time with someone who'd make my day ;)
4. spraying on the best smelling perfume. ( My theory: "Smell good. Good day") rofl!
5. sketching/painting. Just making something with my hands.
6. rambling about pretty hilarious nonsense
7. a good gut wrenching laugh that leaves ur cheek muscles aching, face flushed.
8. reminding myself it won't be long when I'll next have my toes in sand, skin warmed by the sun & hair knotted by the salt water & wind...or... =x
9. Looking at something that makes me smile (inside & out). ( i recommend carrying that with you always if you've got something that makes u smile that way ;))
10. Try looking at the good I've accomplished today ( some done...umm..)
11. GOOD MUSIC ( that's always a thumbs up)

Lastly, putting in a "request" that hopefully gets heard & answered......

" Forgive me for
what I've failed to accomplish.
Take away this run down feeling please.
Provide me with what I need.
Reward me with
what I wish"

** aight, back to the drawing board**

OH! & DO NOTE: all characters & scenes described are purely out of my twisted imagination (check "comecollectmythoughts"). "did I hear the crowd go awww..." 'haha :)

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